What the F-Amily, Tano?

Seriously. You thought your family was messed up.

Last week was very emotional. My 6th graders were so abominably rude to the teachers and each other (in front of the PRINCIPAL) that I felt overwhelmed with responsibility guilt. Even though I know it isn't my fault, I suddenly felt like I should have done better reigning-in their naughty asses. I turned to apologize to Kocho-sensei, and as I said, "I'm so sorry, I really did do my best," I started to cry. Principal was alarmed and apologized to me and said, "no no, I'm the one who's sorry. You did your best." And tried to hug me. Japanese people don't hug, so you can imagine what she must have thought of my distress.

Today was Monday and my JR High English teacher gave a little speech to the 3rd graders (read 9th graders for equivalent age group/maturity level) about bad students and her personal experiences with rude kids. She almost cried too! A couple of kids in the front row whispered, "Ganbare" (which means, hold your chin up, try hard not to cry), but I was very surprised at her emotion. This is not a common thing in Japan.

After class, we started talking about the kids. We went over a list of 6th graders and she started telling me about their families and about some of the other kids in JR High.

"Oh, Natsumi-chan, her brother goes here, but he has communication problem. And she is, um, very awkward, very coarse."

"Oh, Kenta-kun, yes, his mother died of cancer when he was in elementary school and his father became alcoholic. No job. Poverty. He has a younger sister."

"Yes, those boys mother and father divorced. No jobs. Everybody lives in one house. Poverty. That boy, just give up. He doesn't see any future. No dreams."

"Tatsu and Noru, their mother married two or three times. Maybe all different fathers for three boys."

"Taro-kun, his mother is his father's fourth wife. I think maybe things at home, not so good right now. His older brother also married twice, just recently. His second wife was my former student and he already has a baby from first marriage. I think the home life is very complicated."

No. Shit.

The list goes on, and these were only the ones she told me about. This is a small town. In JAPAN. A country that prides itself on family-centeredness and community connection. In a town with tons of money, so that they can afford two JETs. What's going on? Is something in the water? I asked JTE-sensei.

"I don't know what's going wrong. But it gets very hard to be a teacher here. Every day, I have to drive to this boy's house and wake him up for school. Parents have no control. They say, teachers must control children, but I don't think, I think it's too much. I wanted to be a teacher until I am retiring age, but now I think I can't do it."

I couldn't do it, that's for sure.

I Vant to See Ze Nekid Man - Doreen

The above quote is from a hilariously funny and quite lovely German JET participant who lives near my friend Melania. Our little travel group is slowly growing in number. We started as three (or perhaps they started as two before I joined; but you wouldn't be interested in that) and we have grown to five: four ladies and one man; two americans, two brits, and a german; one fluent japanese speaker, one capable japanese speaker, two less capable but not completely helpless japanese speakers, and one slightly less capable than those japanese speaker; five nerds. It can't be helped. We all are geeky in our own individual ways.


Every  year in Okayama, on Honshu (the main island of Japan - not sure about my spelling - don't judge), there is a massive festival surrounding a shrine. Hadaka Matsuri' 裸祭り or Naked Man Festival is based on an ancient religious tradition where priests used to throw talismans out into the crowd for good luck. The incident spread in fame and fantasy (those who caught the trinkets were said to have good luck because of them) and many people began coming from far and wide to participate. People beat each other up to get the "lucky sticks" (there is one main one with incense in it and two decoys without incense) and eventually it evolved into a man-only event. The participants strip down to traditional underwear (called a fundoshi) and jostle with each other for the sticks. Nowadays it is a slick little festival with businesses sending in teams of guys from all over, sometimes yakuza members have teams, the foreigners have a team, etc... and everyone vying for the lucky sticks. 


It can get quite packed in the temple. About 2,000 or more fellows were packed into a very small space waiting for lights out. When the lights go off, the priests throw the sticks into the mass of men, and they start fighting for the talismans. It was the middle of February so it was freezing, but the guys were huddled so closely together and packed in like so many sardines, that the cool water the priests threw on them actually turned into steam after hitting them. It was a rough looking fight. The temple is on a raised platform and guys were continually being shoved to the edges and pushed off the sides down wooden steps. The domino effect was on full display with frightening consequences - the avalanche of men was at times truly scary. You thought they were all going to die. No one did, but you totally thought it was possible, under the circumstances. 

Volunteer police come out to patrol and make sure no rough-housing is allowed.
I heard a story about a guy who saw a yakuza member pull a crowbar
out of his fundoshi, break another dude's arm, and stick it back
before anybody caught him. Thank you, Mr. Policeman!

A random set up of hot water so the participants can bathe afterwards
as they run back to their dressing tents to put their clothes on.

The participants arrive early, and run into a tent. Any tent will do, unless you think it belongs to a bank, or somewhere else you may not be allowed, I suppose. Someone helps you tie that underwear on damn tight - and you want it tight, because you don't want anything falling out when you're in the midst of the horde. Then you run out and look for other guys to run with.

You arrive at the temple and huddle as closely together with other men as you can, to try to get to the center of the mass for a better reach at getting the incense and also for warmth. Because it snowed today in Okayama. More on that later.

Naked men. All trying to stay up on the platform. Or around it.

Once you have the stick you try to make it out of the temple grounds, by running through one of the three gates. We don't know who won this bout, but we know they were happy about it. It's a whole year of good luck. And some of us need that.

If you can't beat someone else up for your good luck, consider lighting
a candle. They took this down once it got crowded up there.